Meditation Kicks Ass

sit. stay. heal.
Day Ninety-Eight
Old Blue Last Pub
Shoreditch, London, England
That’s me with
Austin Brown
he’s my friend
and
he plays guitar
with
Parquet Courts
a 
punk band
from
Brooklyn
Before I tell you how
I came to be
backstage with him
let me first say that
much as I
dedicated many posts 
to discussing
Meditation Camp
I am pretty certain that
many of the next batch of posts
will refer to a book calledThe Feeling Buddha
by 
David Brazier
My friend 
Tom
recommended this book
and it
is
rocking my world
I mean it is 
ROCKING IT
profound changes are
afoot
So anyway
last night I was
riding the Tube 
and reading the book
and I got to this part 
about
Asking for Help
something I am working at
trying to be more graceful about
and then
when I was above ground
at the Arnos Grove stop
the plan was to
go back to Raz’s
and reflect in my journal
only a text popped up
from 
Samantha
I’ve known her since
she was sixteen
I love Sam so much
she’s like a daughter to me
and she saidThe Parquet Courts
are playing tonight
in London!
Come to the show!
Sam was with them
because she and Austin
are a couple
so I thought
screw self-reflection
and I went back underground
and 
I hauled ass 
to the gig
and told my 
lack of sense of direction
to 
fuck itself
and 
I got there
in time
but it was 
FULL
and so I was stuck
outside
Then
maybe because
I’d just been reading 
the chapter about 
putting out one’s
metaphorical
begging bowl 
and
asking for help
when you need something
but maybe because
I am —
if I may say so with
humility—
kind of awesome at
getting into shows
or
possibly a combo of 
these things
Well anyway
I talked to 
the door guy
and he had me
talk to Katie in Charge
and she
let me in the pub
but then
I was stuck in the queue 
to get upstairs 
to the actual show
The queue was
ridiculously impossibly long
on the bright side
Henry was in it
so I queued up
next to him
and then
I thought
I need to ask for 
more help
I texted Sam
to no avail
so I wrote 
a little handwritten note
to Austin
and
found Katie in Charge
and
handed it to her
and asked her to deliver it
and
next thing you know
Katie is taking us up
a back staircase
and suddenly we are
in a room
with
young rock gods
and
models
(Sam is a
among other things
a model)
But I don’t say that
as inOh look at me
hanging with the
beautiful people
I say it as in
They were all
SO SWEET
and
having a great time
Then
Parquet Courts 
went on
and 
THEY TORE IT UP
They are
SO PUNK
and
SO TIGHT
and this got me
revisiting a theory
I’ve touched on here before
about how
even though I’m not sure
I buy into the whole
Reincarnation with a capital R thing
I have endless examples 
of how
in this very lifetime
I have been
reborn
again and again
into 
circumstances that
echo past circumstances
which yes
is related probably
to the
Compulsive Repetition stuff
I mentioned the other day
in which I am repeatedly drawn
to bad drama
as I try to use
Present Tense Moments
to fix
Past Tense Events
futile even for
an 
English Major
trust me
But once in awhile
an 
echo bounces in
and it is
GOOD
like this cool
deja vu
only different
Hard to explain but
for instance
Here I am
at a punk show
in a pub
in London
my heart and mind
feel sixteen
Outwardly I know
I don’t look sixteen
because
two hours earlier
some polite young girl
tried to give me her seat
on the train
(it’s this white streak
really affects people)
But I feel sixteen
only this time
unlike when I was sixteen
I’m not wasted
I am paying attention
I am
PRESENT
I’m on the edge
of 
the mosh pit
and
I’m feeling very alive
and
excited
and
I get to relive my
past life
only this time
with 
awareness
which feels
SO COOL
and
fills my heart to bursting
with
gratitude
for this happy do over
and then
right after the show
mostly to avoid getting trampled
I practically staple myself
to Austin’s back
as he jumps off the stage
and I 
shadow him
back to
the green room
and to my
delight
he sits down with me
this kid who
is in a band
on the big time rise
with 
a growing
international following
and he has just
sweated half his weight away
and
honestly I think if I were him
the last thing
I’d want to do at this point
is sit down
and ask Henry’ momHow you doing?
but that’s what he does
and the sweetness fills me
He is being present
what a rockin’ thing 
to do
I cannot believe
I got a second chance
in my life
to be
a late night punk
in a crowded club
in
a hip city
and that
this time
I got to
Pay Attention
Thank you Samantha!
Thank you Austin!
Thank you Parquet Courts!
Thank you Katie in Charge!
Thank you Tom for the book rec!
Thank you David Brazier
for writing the book
and
for reminding me
to 
ASK
and to
put out 
the 
Begging Bowl
so that I
could
get into
that show
Oh
My
Gratitude
is
Overflowing!
May you recognize
do overs
when they present themselves
and may you
be wide awake
and
enjoy the hell out of them
Thank you, London.
Good night

Day Ninety-Eight
Old Blue Last Pub
Shoreditch, London, England
That’s me with
Austin Brown
he’s my friend
and
he plays guitar
with
Parquet Courts
a
punk band
from
Brooklyn
Before I tell you how
I came to be
backstage with him
let me first say that
much as I
dedicated many posts
to discussing
Meditation Camp
I am pretty certain that
many of the next batch of posts
will refer to a book called
The Feeling Buddha
by
David Brazier
My friend
Tom
recommended this book
and it
is
rocking my world
I mean it is
ROCKING IT
profound changes are
afoot
So anyway
last night I was
riding the Tube
and reading the book
and I got to this part
about
Asking for Help
something I am working at
trying to be more graceful about
and then
when I was above ground
at the Arnos Grove stop
the plan was to
go back to Raz’s
and reflect in my journal
only a text popped up
from
Samantha
I’ve known her since
she was sixteen
I love Sam so much
she’s like a daughter to me
and she said
The Parquet Courts
are playing tonight
in London!
Come to the show!

Sam was with them
because she and Austin
are a couple
so I thought
screw self-reflection
and I went back underground
and
I hauled ass
to the gig
and told my
lack of sense of direction
to
fuck itself
and
I got there
in time
but it was
FULL
and so I was stuck
outside
Then
maybe because
I’d just been reading
the chapter about
putting out one’s
metaphorical
begging bowl
and
asking for help
when you need something
but maybe because
I am —
if I may say so with
humility—
kind of awesome at
getting into shows
or
possibly a combo of
these things
Well anyway
I talked to
the door guy
and he had me
talk to Katie in Charge
and she
let me in the pub
but then
I was stuck in the queue
to get upstairs
to the actual show
The queue was
ridiculously impossibly long
on the bright side
Henry was in it
so I queued up
next to him
and then
I thought
I need to ask for
more help
I texted Sam
to no avail
so I wrote
a little handwritten note
to Austin
and
found Katie in Charge
and
handed it to her
and asked her to deliver it
and
next thing you know
Katie is taking us up
a back staircase
and suddenly we are
in a room
with
young rock gods
and
models
(Sam is a
among other things
a model)
But I don’t say that
as in
Oh look at me
hanging with the
beautiful people

I say it as in
They were all
SO SWEET
and
having a great time
Then
Parquet Courts
went on
and
THEY TORE IT UP
They are
SO PUNK
and
SO TIGHT
and this got me
revisiting a theory
I’ve touched on here before
about how
even though I’m not sure
I buy into the whole
Reincarnation with a capital R thing
I have endless examples
of how
in this very lifetime
I have been
reborn
again and again
into
circumstances that
echo past circumstances
which yes
is related probably
to the
Compulsive Repetition stuff
I mentioned the other day
in which I am repeatedly drawn
to bad drama
as I try to use
Present Tense Moments
to fix
Past Tense Events
futile even for
an
English Major
trust me
But once in awhile
an
echo bounces in
and it is
GOOD
like this cool
deja vu
only different
Hard to explain but
for instance
Here I am
at a punk show
in a pub
in London
my heart and mind
feel sixteen
Outwardly I know
I don’t look sixteen
because
two hours earlier
some polite young girl
tried to give me her seat
on the train
(it’s this white streak
really affects people)
But I feel sixteen
only this time
unlike when I was sixteen
I’m not wasted
I am paying attention
I am
PRESENT
I’m on the edge
of
the mosh pit
and
I’m feeling very alive
and
excited
and
I get to relive my
past life
only this time
with
awareness
which feels
SO COOL
and
fills my heart to bursting
with
gratitude
for this happy do over
and then
right after the show
mostly to avoid getting trampled
I practically staple myself
to Austin’s back
as he jumps off the stage
and I
shadow him
back to
the green room
and to my
delight
he sits down with me
this kid who
is in a band
on the big time rise
with
a growing
international following
and he has just
sweated half his weight away
and
honestly I think if I were him
the last thing
I’d want to do at this point
is sit down
and ask Henry’ mom
How you doing?
but that’s what he does
and the sweetness fills me
He is being present
what a rockin’ thing
to do
I cannot believe
I got a second chance
in my life
to be
a late night punk
in a crowded club
in
a hip city
and that
this time
I got to
Pay Attention
Thank you Samantha!
Thank you Austin!
Thank you Parquet Courts!
Thank you Katie in Charge!
Thank you Tom for the book rec!
Thank you David Brazier
for writing the book
and
for reminding me
to
ASK
and to
put out
the
Begging Bowl
so that I
could
get into
that show
Oh
My
Gratitude
is
Overflowing!
May you recognize
do overs
when they present themselves
and may you
be wide awake
and
enjoy the hell out of them
Thank you, London.
Good night

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